South Park Self

a paranoid society of celibate martial artists

Right, well, that was the second weekend in a row I haven't had internet, and frankly I'm surprised I'm as sane as I am. Two and a half hours on various helplines over two days, half of it with Telkom, ritual ptooey. Imaginet opines that there is nothing wrong with my ADSL setup, the line itself must be faulty. Telkom denies this and attempts to fob me off by insisting I report a technical fault to Imaginet, not them. The Imaginet tech guy has become my absolute hero by admitting that he quite enjoys shouting at Telkom technicians and will be delighted to do so on my behalf. I wonder if he's married?

The ginger tomcat seems to have moved in, taking full advantage of the deep psychological trauma it's caused me to cause Ounce deep psychological trauma by initially shouting at him a lot when he tried to move in. The Evil Landlord is of the opinion that Ginger is actually a hobbit, which I have to admit makes perfect sense: he seems unduly fixated on food, besides the obligatory hairiness, large feet and what appears to be an unhealthy fondness for weed. If he sticks around he's going to have to be Pippin, if only so I can shout "Fool of a Took!" irascibly every time I fall over him for the nine millionth time because he's entwined affectionately around my ankles in the hopes I'm about to offer him second breakfast. In an attempt to forestall this apparently inevitable fate I must still undertake a quick trot around the neighbourhood, possibly with Ginger in a cat box, to see if any nearby household is bewilderedly mourning his loss. Do You Recognise This Cat?:



He's actually very beautiful, and uncommonly teddy-bearish.

The internet debacle was, of course, mitigated somewhat by the usual retreat into The Middleman, panacea to all ills. Goofy Middleman Exclamations Du Jour include "What the monkey?!" "Holy jumping bananas!" "Mutual of Omaha!" "Sweet mother of Preston Tucker!" and "Hot flaming pork buns!". Dagnabbit Count, tragically, at 0 for Episode 3. Interesting time-zone unlikelinesses: Hawaii-Aleutian Standard Time, Foxtrot Time, Heure Normale Du Yukon, Coordinated Universal Time, Charlie Time, Zulu Time. Bonus points for unusually delirious silliness: the Hruck Bugbear, the Wu-Han Thumb of Death, O2STK, the Clan of the Pointed Stick, gratuitous quantities of evil Lucha Libre wrestlers and the Dread Pyramid of Itzilichlitlichlitzl. I love this show.
  • Current Mood: annoyed Monday. Phooey.
how could anyone misplace such a lovely animal?
I am so looking forward to living with mine again
Life without cats is indeed incomplete, although I suspect that life with four cats is slightly more complete than it strictly needs to be. On the other hand cats happen to you, and it's pointless to resist. If I can't find his actual owner and the EL doesn't object, I'll be very happy to keep him. Ounce will be very traumatised, but life's too short to worry about the passing molecules of air which randomly traumatise Ounce.
sorry, sidetracked myself from the point, which was to say I'm very happy to think of you being very happy at being reunited with your cats.
Awwwwwwwwwwww...
... a kitty! Lookit his floofy tum! You must keep him, your house has been sorely lacking in floofy tum.
Re: Awwwwwwwwwwww...
Hey, what's Ounce's floofy tum, chopped floofy liver? We already have an adequate floofy tum quotient, although conversely more is always good.
Re: Awwwwwwwwwwww...
Ounce has never let me stroke his floofy tum. Probably all that trauma at a young age :P. This kitty looks like a slut and is probably up for all kinds of floofy tum stroking.
Re: Awwwwwwwwwwww...
God, yes, total slut. If you stop petting him he rears up to hug your knee and nip your hand. Demanding.
There has been a surprisingly low level of growling and spitting from both sides. Ginger is terminally chilled, possibly because of all the weed, and Golux seems politely bemused. Ounce and Todal are a bit wild-eyed and tending to skulk in corners, but I'm sure they'll settle down.
I agree, you must please keep him if no-one claims him, he looks so cuddly! I adore ginger toms, my Last Cat was one, and a sweeter cat I have never met.

I heard over the weekend how many people move house and just leave their pets behind. It never ceases to amaze me.
Oh, if we don't find his owner we're definitely keeping him. He was a huge hit at the movie evening last night - jo&stv approve, and also agree that he's clearly a hobbit. The other cats are settling down, too. He has pretty much conquered the household.
(Anonymous)
That kitteh looks *amazing*, it's just as well he's on another continent or I'd be trying to steal him from you. Not sure how Jemima would feel about that either.

scroob
Kitty porn! He's gorgeous-also clearly very smart, since he has adopted you already! I'm sure he's just waiting for you to catch up. :)

I have the first Middleman DVD on order at Netflix. If I like it, I plan to order it on Amazon (where I still haven't spent my $40).
(Anonymous)
I have just learned a new word and immediately thought of your lucky household. Did you know you have a clowder?

scroob, again
Cats
Pff, clowder. A group of sleeping cats is a puddle. A group of awake cats is a conspiracy.

My Pandora managed to get the packet of biltong out of a closed drawer last night and nom it all. This morning the drawer was still closed but the packet was asploded on the floor. I still have no idea how she did it.
Re: Cats
Pshaw. "Clowder" is a lovely word, and always makes me think of dozens of cats at midnight in a ruined building on a heath. Plotting.

Unless Pandora has acquired the weird relocatory teleportery ray-gun thing from Torchwood (it transports things that arrive exploded), she probably climbed up the back of the drawers from the bottom. If there is such a space. If not, be very afraid.